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Written by theinsomniac88.


I’ve always believed that ignorance is bliss. This was confirmed In 2011 when my loving family, Vicky my sister, my mom and dad, carted me off to the Dr. Phil show. What’s worse, they brought me there to reveal that I was being ‘cat-fished’ - which for those of you who don’t know means duped by an invented online persona. Now, I’ve never claimed to be the brightest, and I may have believed in Santa Clause a little too long, but this was a whole new level of stupidity for me. On national television I looked like a fool.. a lonely virginal fool at that. It wasn’t even the 42 grand I had lost to a scam, or the good 16 months of my life I had spent falling in love with someone’s stolen facebook photos and broken english poetry… it was the fact that my family felt I would only listen when my dirty laundry was aired in front of millions of laughing people. When the Dr. Phil promo has him smugly saying to the camera "today is a changing day in your life", he was not directing it at me unless it is meant to be ironic. After the show, I felt nothing but degraded and ashamed. They say ignorance is bliss, and that’s true because I folded into myself, shunning friends (the few I had), family, and good hygiene. The last few days before the incident, I’d simply turned my phone off, having screened and ignored 50+ calls from my parents. On the other hand, I had been more than happy to welcome delivery pepperoni pizza, and endless hours of surfing reddit. Admittedly, being catfished then spending 13+ hours a day online surfing was like jumping out of the frying pan and into the fire - but screw it. I deserved this. I had already crossed shameful and was headed straight for pathetic at 80mph. There had been some progress in those few days though - I cut off my ‘girlfriend’ (online imposter) entirely. I said goodbye forever to photos of nice boobs, and I resolved to never send her (or him, god knew) another penny. At first, she sent threatening and scathing messages, saying how she would get me back for doing this. Then she said unless I sent her money she would kill everything I loved. She said she knew who my family was and where they lived and that I was screwed. Considering that I’ve resigned her to being in the Ukraine or him to being in Nigeria, I didn’t take any of the threats seriously. Even her ominous last words ‘you’ll regret this...’ didn’t manage to shake me. So last Monday, five slices into my pepperoni pizza, I was at home surfing reddit and doing a lot of nothing. Suddenly, on my computer these chat windows start popping up. You know, the standard ‘Ulga needs a friend, she’s horny’ type spam… the stuff that originally got me into this mess. As someone who has learned their lesson the hard way - I closed the window. One minute later ‘Irena wants to play, she’s horny’...... closed again. One more minute passes when ‘Ivanka’s been a bad girl, she needs a spanking’.... closed again - adblock enabled. But the windows kept popping up ‘Veronica wants to be dominated, she loves a man with cuffs’.... ‘Chrissy’s hot and wet and wants a big...’ As many as I tried to close, more and more popped up so I shut off my computer resolving to take it to the tech tomorrow. I went to the fridge to grab a beer with the plan of binging on Netflix when I heard this strange beeping coming from my room. I went back to my desk and noticed that the sound was coming from my computer. Screen entirely black, there was an open chat window. Tori: I want to show you something. Seemed like quite the virus, and as I had nothing better to do… Me: What can I do for you… Tori: I want to show you something. Me: Where are you? Tori: I want to show you something. Me: Ok - let’s see it! And in that moment, my screen blasted to life - and not with what I had assumed I’d see. There, I saw my sister Victoria - bound, gagged, and naked. She’d been brutalized - it was clear from the way she was panting and sobbing, that this had started long before I became the audience. I tried to look away out of respect, but couldn’t sensing the horrors that would come next. A masked man entered brandishing tools such as knives, pliers, and a blow torch. I screamed incessantly at the screen to stop and that I’d do and give anything for my sister. I frantically called 911 just as I watched him tear each tooth from my sister’s swollen and bloody mouth. Through tears I tried to explain to the dispatcher what was happening as he scalped my sister and gouged out her eyes. I screamed and pleaded for help as he torched and flayed her skin. I watched in disbelief as he disemboweled my sister and proceeded to slice her into pieces. It was only then that I noticed the industrial machinery in the video’s background which he used to grind my only sibling’s body parts to a meaty pulp. As I heard the police sirens coming down the street, I watched the murderer peel away his face mask to reveal the man who had been delivering my pizza for the last few days. I wretched and screamed, and when the cops burst into my house, they found me vomiting and frantically shrieking at a blank screen about how I had eaten my sister. Vicky had disappeared 2 days prior and I’m likely to be incarcerated for life for her murder - or, if they ever find a body, put to death… but I know they won’t. According to the DA and Police, there was no pizza guy and there was no video. Apparently I had a psychotic break after Vicky orchestrated the biggest embarrassment of my already pathetic life. I have been presumed guilty and am resigned to my fate. In the end, I blame Dr. Phil…. after all, ignorance is bliss.

Video Edit

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CREEPYPASTA-Dr. Phil Ruined My Life

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