What color is this dress? Is it blue and black? Or is it gold and white?
The answer is that, in reality and in accordance with the rules of what human society has determined to be color: the dress is indeed blue and black. It can appear to be gold and white because of how shoddy the quality of the image and its lighting are. If all you see is gold and white still, here's a hint: squint, and if your monitor is adjustable, turn it physically upward. Perhaps back away a few feet, if you must. Concentrate on the dress itself: ignore the lighting. Cover as much as possible of the really light parts with your hand, if you're still not seeing what many perceive to be the truth. Do you see blue and black now?
If you don't: don't worry about it. There isn't anything directly serious or creepy about this dress or its colorful controversy. It all has to do with human perception.
Color is not a physical property in and of itself per se, but the result of how the human retina interprets measures of wavelength. Your friend saying gold and white isn't necessary wrong, nor is your aunt who is screaming up and down that it's blue and black as the night. Again: it's a matter of lighting and human perception. Those who say white and gold are simply operating on an alternate layer of human perception, based on an 'outside' condition.
So yes. That's the story of the controversial dress that broke the Internet. Nothing more and nothing less.
Ah. Actually, I do have one more element of this to add...
While you were fascinated over the true color of this dress: internet neutrality was voted on. The long-time beloved television and film star Leonard Nimoy passed on. And if you had any other suspicions--any suspicions at all--about anything other than this dress... you might have missed on something that would otherwise be very important to you.
Perilous actions occurred, and paper and cyber trails were covered up, and will never be discovered. This was all in the time that you and your kind were concentrating on that dress. Believe me: I know.
And would you like to know why?
The answer is actually kind of funny: as it is also a matter of human perception... and light, though of more than just a physical sense.
Many interpret me as being red, yellow, and sometimes, black. In short: I am the fire and brimstone. And I am enjoying every single last moment of your... fascination.
I am Satan.